| (no subject) |
[Nov. 7th, 2009|12:20 am] |
|
read
don't sit around
desensitize (selectively)
drink coffee (but on a budget)
wear winter coats in preparation for winter
continue daydreaming about san francisco
walk home
be largely anti-social without hating people |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|04:05 pm] |
|
it would be great to have more hours in the day and be able to do it all |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Nov. 2nd, 2009|05:23 pm] |
|
got to work at a stand for my dad today, it is such a great job. so much reading and writing and generally friendly people, and food and coffee! i am doing some serious fantasizing about moving up here after i graduate. it's going to be great, i can picture it already. my dad is thinking about getting a stand on valencia once they finish remodeling it so that it has all these big sidewalks and grass and stuff, and i am totally daydreaming about having a punk rock coffee stand and blasting music with a different punk theme every day (ie: riot grrrl, local punk, folk punk, pop punk, hella 90's punk, i don't know, help me think of other ideas!). oh man i can't wait for that life. i am doing really well in school and i am really, really happy in santa cruz. i never have anything to complain about. but i am still itching to leave because i need more strangers and a wider variety of coffee shops and more romantic public transportation. and i can't wait to have a job so that once i leave the work that i do is the work i want to be doing and not some dumb assignment, and i will get a million things done. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 30th, 2009|03:46 pm] |
|
this is a good season. the weather's good and there's a lot going on. learning a lot and having an exponentially growing to-do list and lots of good people around, which means i'm pretty happy most of the time. How Can I Tell Her? is really great. i will post the link to the website once we make it. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 25th, 2009|05:50 pm] |
|
leaving really does work. how can i tell her works even better! |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 25th, 2009|12:34 pm] |
|
i'm great at self-inducing depression and i'm great at dragging my feet when i know i should get up and go. its trivial though
|
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 25th, 2009|11:19 am] |
fucking a, school applications are a lot of work!
i haven't even started filling them out, i'm just trying to get all the requirements in!!! next semester is gonna be intense.
im thinking i'll only be in SF till Jan...maybe December. Tony and I keep having disputes, and I think it'd be easier for me to be in San Carlos if I'm taking all my classes at CSM next semester. Plus, I think it'll be easier for him to have his GF here whenever he wants and I won't be in the way. I am grateful for the time that I have spent here, and I loveeee SF, but. It's too stressful for me to be here and I think it's stressful to him, too. To him, I'm a slacker that lacks initiative and blah blah blah. To me, he breathes down my neck all the time and I feel like he's constantly lecturing and that the rules apply to me but never to him. He's not used to having a roomate, and I'm not used to having one either. He barks at me about not getting things done, but I work between 25-30 hours a week and have school and am tired when I come home. I try to get things done when I can, but he's at home all day so he can sit and let it stew, and then he gets mad. I understand his frustration, but come on. He said that the fridge NEEDED to get cleaned...he left to go see his mom, and he was coming back the next day and it was imperative that it was done. I ditched Arabic class even though I have a midterm this upcoming week because I knew I'd be too tired after class to clean out the fridge. Sometimes I feel like I'm living with my stepmom. I'm walking on eggshells and I don't feel comfortable. I know I haven't been the best roomate...I could do more. But like yesterday...He said, "Be home by 10:30 am, so we can get to work and kick ass till 5!"...I was here at 10:30 like he asked me today. He was with his GF for a good portion of the day, and finally asked me to work at 4pm. I had work at 7, so I told him I'd work for an hour and then be done. He looked really irritated, and today he texts me from the other room and says, "You ready to work today? I dont want a repeat of yesterday where you said you'd work for 7 hours and only worked for 1"...so I replied, "I was here exactly when you asked me to be. You were with Savannah all day, while WE were supposed to be working"...and hes like, "That was your opportunity to take INITIATIVE and do it without me telling you to. I don't wanna argue about it. Whatever, go do your thing. I'm sick of this bullshit".
I dunno. Whatever. It is what it is. I'm just being really bitchy right now, and I don't know if its because I'm irritated, if its because I'm adjusting to the meds, or if it's because I'm actually becoming more assertive and not listening to bullshit. I deleted people off my facebook, and am cutting people out of my life.
I'm going to Belmont today. I need away from dis! I neeeeed to study for Arabic. Bye. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
assirac's Friends Page